Understanding the Wound You Can’t Always See: Trauma Therapy Bay Area

Written By Brett Gaynor

What Trauma Therapy in the Bay Area Can Help You Understand

If you hear the word "trauma" and immediately think of catastrophic events—war, assault, disasters—you’re not wrong. But that’s only part of the story. Trauma isn’t just about what happens to you. It’s also about how your body and nervous system respond to what happens to you—and whether you had the support you needed to process it.

If you’ve been looking into trauma therapy in the Bay Area or searching for a trusted psychologist for trauma in Berkeley, you may already have a sense that healing from trauma isn’t only about revisiting memories. Instead, it’s often about learning how to reconnect with your body, find safety in the present, and build new patterns of emotional resilience.

Whether your experience of trauma stems from a single life-changing event or a series of quiet, cumulative stressors over time, it can reshape how you see yourself, others, and the world. Trauma doesn’t have to be dramatic to be valid—and you don’t have to go through it alone.

This post offers a trauma-informed, compassionate lens for understanding what trauma really is (and isn’t), how it may be affecting your day-to-day life, and how trauma therapy in the Bay Area can support the path forward.

As Dr. Gabor Maté writes, “Trauma is not what happens to you. Trauma is what happens inside you as a result of what happened to you.”

If that quote resonates, keep reading.

So, What Is Trauma Really?

Trauma is often defined clinically as an emotional response to a deeply distressing or disturbing event. But in real life, trauma can show up as anything that overwhelms your nervous system’s ability to cope.

·      It might be a car accident.

·      A parent’s divorce.

·      A breakup that shattered your sense of self.

·      A betrayal.

·      A job loss.

·      Medical trauma.

·      Bullying.

·      Racial trauma.

·      Even sustained emotional neglect.

The hallmark of trauma isn’t always the event itself—it’s the nervous system's lingering inability to return to safety and regulation afterward. When the body doesn’t get the chance to “complete” its stress cycle, it can stay stuck in

·      fight,

·      flight,

·      freeze,

·      or fawn (behaving in a people-pleasing way to avoid conflict and establish a sense of safety) responses for weeks, months, or years.

How Trauma Shows Up in Everyday Life

Unresolved trauma doesn’t just live in the past. It shows up in the present—in ways that are often confusing, frustrating, or misunderstood. You might notice:

  • Anxiety or panic attacks

  • Hypervigilance (constantly scanning for danger)

  • Feeling “numb” or disconnected from your body

  • Difficulty trusting others

  • Emotional reactivity

  • Difficulty with boundaries

  • Chronic shame or self-blame

  • Trouble sleeping

  • Flashbacks or nightmares

You might not even identify it as trauma at first. You might just think something’s “off”—that you’re “too sensitive” or “overreacting.” People in your life my wrongly give you these messages. However, underneath many mental health struggles is a nervous system doing its best to protect you based on past experiences.

Trauma and the Nervous System: Why It Stays in the Body

As Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score, famously said: “Trauma is not the story of something that happened back then. It’s the current imprint of that pain, horror, and fear living inside people.”

When we’re overwhelmed, our nervous system creates a survival response, or a response that protects from overwhelm when trauma is occurring in real time. But if we’re not able to discharge that stress or make sense of the experience, those sensations and emotions don’t just vanish—they get stored in our body, our physiology, and even our beliefs.

This is why traditional talk therapy or CBT, while helpful for many, isn’t always enough. Trauma lives in the body—and we need body-informed approaches to truly resolve it.

Types of Trauma: Big “T” and Little “t”

Trauma doesn’t need to be catastrophic to be real.

  • Big “T” Trauma includes major life events like abuse, violence, accidents, natural disasters, or serious illness.

  • Little “t” trauma includes less obvious but equally impactful experiences—like emotional neglect, chronic criticism, or growing up in a high-conflict home.

Both can leave long-lasting emotional and physiological effects. And both are completely valid reasons to seek support.

What Makes a Therapist Trauma-Informed?

A trauma-informed therapist doesn’t just treat symptoms—they understand the root causes. They:

  • Create a safe, supportive, non-judgmental environment

  • Move at your pace and prioritize your sense of control

  • Understand how trauma impacts the brain and body

  • Use interventions that respect your nervous system (like EMDR, somatic therapy, IFS, or polyvagal-informed approaches)

Working with a psychologist for trauma in Berkeley or surrounding Bay Area who is trauma-informed means you’re not expected to “push through” or relive pain before you’re ready. Instead, the focus is on building safety, awareness, and integration.

What Healing From Trauma Actually Looks Like

Healing isn’t linear. It’s not about “getting over it” or never being triggered again. It’s about increasing your capacity to stay present, connected, and grounded—even when life gets hard.

Here’s what healing might involve:

  • Learning to regulate your nervous system

  • Identifying and challenging internalized shame or self-blame

  • Reconnecting with your body and emotions

  • Building secure relationships and healthy boundaries

  • Processing stuck memories with support

  • Redefining your story from a place of empowerment

What If You Don’t Remember the Trauma Clearly?

This is incredibly common. The brain’s response to trauma can fragment memory, especially if the experience happened in childhood or was repeated over time.

You don’t need a perfectly detailed timeline to begin trauma therapy. What matters is how your nervous system is carrying the imprint of the experience now—and how we can help it find relief and regulation.

Therapies That Support Trauma Recovery

Trauma therapy isn’t one-size-fits-all. In the Bay Area, you’ll find clinicians integrating a range of evidence-based approaches, including:

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) https://www.selahvietherapy.com/blog/is-emdr-the-therapy-you-didnt-know-you-needed

Each of these approaches honors both your story and your body’s wisdom—and can be tailored to your comfort level and readiness. As a psychologist practicing in Walnut Creek and the greater Bay Area who specializes in trauma these are evidence-based approaches I am extensively trained in and practice

Is It Time to Seek Trauma Therapy?

If any of the following feel true, trauma therapy may be helpful:

  • You feel stuck in emotional patterns that don’t match your current life

  • You’re easily overwhelmed or shut down in stressful situations

  • You’ve tried talk therapy but feel like something deeper needs attention

  • You have a hard time feeling safe in relationships—or in your own body

  • You want support that doesn’t require rehashing everything in detail

Why the Right Therapist Matters

Healing from trauma is sacred work. It requires trust, safety, and attunement. That’s why finding a therapist who sees the whole you—not just your symptoms—is so important.

When looking for trauma therapy in the Bay Area, or a psychologist for trauma in Berkeley, consider someone who:

  • Understands developmental, attachment, and relational trauma

  • Respects your nervous system’s pace

  • Offers modalities beyond traditional talk therapy

  • Prioritizes collaboration, not prescription

What If Change Could Feel Gentle?

You don’t need to be “fixed.” You’re not broken. Your responses make sense when seen through the lens of your history. Trauma therapy isn’t about erasing your story—it’s about integrating it, so it no longer controls you.

As Peter Levine, founder of Somatic Experiencing, said:
“Trauma is a fact of life. It does not, however, have to be a life sentence.”

Let’s Take the Next Step—Together

Whether you’re exploring trauma therapy in the Bay Area for the first time, looking for a psychologist for trauma in Berkeley, or simply curious about what healing could feel like, I’d be honored to walk alongside you.

✅ Explore my therapy services  https://www.selahvietherapy.com/services


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You don’t have to do this alone. Support is here—and it’s never too late to begin to art of becoming your true self.

Brett Gaynor
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